Saturday, October 02, 2004

"It's all bullshit anyways"

How often should someone be allowed to use this phrase? I think I've used it in 12 times in the last week. For some reason I really feel like I've reached my quota for the year. But then again look at the world I live in ! Ha, easy excuse I know, but it really seems like I explain away just about everything.

I guess the most recent being the dating scene. I mean, I've gone out a few times, to parties, to a bar, for fika etc. It's been terribly disappointing. The people I've hung out with so far are great, but they are all committed. It's not really my thing to date committed people. That seems reasonable right? What really gets my goat though is the "let's talk about stuff and then not do it." I absolutely hate people who make plans and can't follow through. Not that I don't flake out sometimes, but it's just the consistent flaking out that really gets to me.

For one, my new friends have 'passed on' my number to prospective people. And yet, they haven't called. Not that I'm suprised for some, but I've actually met others. The frustrating thing now is that you have to explain away why they haven't called and it's the weekend. Clearly they aren't too busy. I wish people would just decline politely and not string people along.

The other problem I'm having is getting out on the scene. It's tough enough to get me out. As many of you know, I absolutely hate to dance. Mi got me dancing a few times by getting me so drunk I could barely stand. So, unless I'm in a drunken stupor forget me dancing. So, I am probably not going to meet many people at dance clubs. Couple that with my inability to walk into a bar by myself and just throw myself at people. I did go to a pub though where I knew absolutely no one. I introduced my self to someone and thought the person would do the polite thing and introduce me to others. Oh no. Instead, I Was cornered for an hour or so talking environmental policy. Then I introduced myself to other peoples, but they are all in groups, so it's really hard to break into a group like that. I've just come to the conclusion that it's all bullshit. About the only way, like law school, I am going to get by is to get better at it. I'm not sure I want to, but I've got little choice. It is all bullshit ... isn't it?

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