Thursday, March 31, 2005

Birthday fun, kinda

keep in mind I found this randomly surfing other people's blogs. Someone's put together a thing to tell you what song was No. 1 on the pop charts per year. They started in 1955 in the US and Nov 1952 in the UK.


  1. Use this link:
    http://www.thisdayinmusic.com/member/birthdayno1.php
  2. Put in your 18th birthday
  3. choose US or UK popcharts.

Embarrasingly, the song at No. 1 for my 18th was the Macarena ... I've never been so humiliated. This song is supposed to be a tell-tell of your life. Somehow, I don't see it. Flailing arms, squared rotations, latin beats ... I am at a loss, since none of those fits my life in the least -- I have decidely controled movement of my arms, which should not go over your head when you dance; I tend to head in straight lines, with general goals in mind; I live in sweden ... SWEDEN; there is a notable lack of latin-ness here.

Have fun

~B

Angels, a temporary obsession?

When I was a kid TV was THE thing. I now realize it's because my mom watches more tv than most people. The dern thing is ALWAYS on. Swedish TV thwarts her regularly though, canceling and moving shows around.

When I was a kid I used to watch the million dollar man, charlies angels, night rider and V -- ah and sometimes A Team. I guess Angels were mostly reruns, but I still liked them.

The Angels in Stockholm?! Now the Angels come on, late at night, on swedish TV. I was watching some show my mom records daily, and the tail end had a Charlies Angels episode at the very end. I was shocked. Then I sat, mesmorized at the train wreck that was Charlies Angels. She's recorded a few episodes for me since they come on right after her;s, and I think I'm hooked. NO LAUGHING. They are campy, but fun in a McGyver meets woman's lib way. I'm enjoying them anyways :)

~B

State of the Readers 4.1.03

It's official. I'm obsessed. I have many really neat additions to the readizens. So much fun I decided to make a post after what, like 2 days of stats? Here goes:

As of March 30:

  1. Network
    29%

  2. IP
    24%

  3. Commerical
    20%

  4. TONGA (TO)
    9%

  5. SWEDEN (SE)
    8%

  6. FRANCE (FR)
    5%

  7. NEW ZEALAND (NZ)
    1%

  8. JAPAN (JP)
    1%

  9. Educational
    1%

  10. CANADIA (CA)
    1%

  11. AUSTRIA (AT)
    1%




As of March 31:


  1. Network
    30%

  2. IP
    28%

  3. Commerical
    17%

  4. TONGA (TO)
    7%

  5. SWEDEN (SE)
    5%

  6. FRANCE (FR)
    5%

  7. Educational
    3%

  8. NEW ZEALAND (NZ)
    1%

  9. JAPAN (JP)
    1%

  10. US Government (GOV)
    1%

  11. CANADIA (CA)
    1%

  12. AUSTRALIA (AU)
    1%



I love my diverse audience :) The big brother percetnage is a little unnerving, in a good, breadth of audience kind of ... nevermind. I hope you guys enjoy reading. I eagerly anticipate having more pictures of Mt St Michel and Paris up this weekend.
**********
UPDATE!!!!

As of March 31


  1. Network
    28%

  2. IP
    28%

  3. Commerical
    14%

  4. SWEDEN (SE)
    9%

  5. TONGA (TO)
    6%

  6. FRANCE (FR)
    5%

  7. Educational
    4%

  8. UNITED KINGDOM (UK)
    1%

  9. NEW ZEALAND (NZ)
    1%

  10. JAPAN (JP)
    1%

  11. US Government (GOV)
    1%

  12. CANADIA (CA)
    1%

  13. AUSTRALIA (AU)
    1%



I also wanted to note that someone from my alma mater visited today. Strangely, the Johns Hopkins University community has found me at last :) Fun. Have a good one.

~B

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

Really Fun Lawyering Jokes :)

I got this yesterday, it is from an email forwarded to my mom. It's a total riot if you've any lawyer friends, hate lawyers or function in mainstream society. I thought they were pretty funny at least :) Then again, I'm a sick lawyer-hating-lawyer.

-----------

These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are
things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now
published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while
these exchanges were actually taking place.



Q: Are you sexually active?

A: No, I just lie there.

__________________________________

Q: What is your date of birth?

A: July 15th.

Q: What year?

A: Every year.

______________________________________

Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?

A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

______________________________________

Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?

A: Yes.

Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?

A: I forget.

Q: You forget? Can you give us an example of something that you've

forgotten?

_____________________________________

Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?

A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.

Q: How long has he lived with you?

A: Forty-five years.

_____________________________________

Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up

that morning?

A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"

Q: And why did that upset you?

A: My name is Susan.

______________________________________

Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo or the

occult?

A: We both do.

Q: Voodoo?

A: We do.

Q: You do?

A: Yes, voodoo.

______________________________________

Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he

doesn't know about it until the next morning?

A: Did you actually pass the bar exam?

___________________________________

Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?

_____________________________________

Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?

______________________________________

Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?

A: Yes.

Q: And what were you doing at that time?

______________________________________

Q: She had three children, right?

A: Yes.

Q: How many were boys?

A: None.

Q: Were there any girls?

______________________________________

Q: How was your first marriage terminated?

A: By death.

Q: And by whose death was it terminated?

______________________________________

Q: Can you describe the individual?

A: He was about medium height and had a beard.

Q: Was this a male, or a female?

______________________________________

Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice

which I sent to your attorney?

A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

______________________________________

Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?

A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.

______________________________________

Q: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?

A: Oral.

______________________________________

Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?

A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.

Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?

A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an

autopsy.

______________________________________

Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?

______________________________________

Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?

A: No.

Q: Did you check for blood pressure?

A: No.

Q: Did you check for breathing?

A: No.

Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began

the autopsy?

A: No.

Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?

A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?

A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law

somewhere


-------

Okay, so I thought they were good :) Have fun everyone.

~b

State of the Readers 4.1.02

As some of you may know there was another earthquake near Thailand and Indonesia yesterday. The death toll is already predicted at 2000 for Indonesia. As much as I want to hope this is an over-estimation, it is probably on par. I had dreams relating to the incident last night. I wanted to send out my support and thoughts to anyone in the region.

On a different note: Foie Gras. Foie Gras is a culinary delicacy of fattented duck liver. Yeah, I said it, fattened duck liver. Oregon is considering a ban on producing the delicacy due to cruelty to the ducks during the cultivation process. They are force-fed corn in the last two weeks of their life. Pretty gross. Here are some interesting links: Yahoo! Story, Sonoma Foie Gras - Producer, and GourmetCruelty - Activist Group. Interestingly, the activist website could use some work. I'm a bit disappointed with the lack of resources and information, not to mention a 'hurt'ing'design. Check it out see what you think, but WARNING, this is not for the feignt of heart.

After a pathetic weekend, I posted some pictures of my trip to Normandy. My traffic trippled, mostly due to google searches for jobs in France. Interestingly, the job searchers stayed to look around :) Here are stats for today:


  1. Net
    28%

  2. Com
    26%

  3. IP only
    22%

  4. TONGA
    10%

  5. SWEDEN
    9%

  6. JAPAN
    2%

  7. Org
    1%

  8. FRANCE (.FR)
    1%

  9. AUSTRIA (.AT)
    1%



Have a good day everybody.

~B

Monday, March 28, 2005

Normandy: Picture Construction Underway

hello all. my post is late today because I've been working, diligently, on altering and uploading pictures. I've about 100 to share with the public. PLEASE notice the following creative license applicable to all references on this page and any page linking to pictures or websites containing pictures I produced.

http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/ (common language)

http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/legalcode (legalese)

With that aside :) We can move on to the actual links and important things.



The links should open a new window to enter the Flickr.com webspace. I'd like to thank Simon for suggesting Flickr.com. I've been very happy with it, thus far. Hope everyone had a great Easter weekend.

My best

~Bsan

Sunday, March 27, 2005

I 'think' it's Easter

So my family was never very religious. There are certain expectations one has for easter though. One, in particular, is an easter basket. OMG, so much fun, so bad for you, and so the purpose for belly-aches in american children for the next two weeks.

I was shocked not to get one. Oh, okay, maybe only a little surprised. I did go out and buy my own candy and had some american candies i'd 'requested' on hand. To my utter dismay, no basket. Oh well. I engorged on enough sweets to put me in a food coma and send me down for a nap.

What, pray tell, is in said basket, one might ask. Traditionally, Easter baskets should have (1) jelly beans, (2) chocolate 'robins' eggs, (3) faux-marshmellow-chic-thingies, (4) fun plastic grass that kills small animals when they eat it cause it chokes their intestings (like xmas tinsel only green), (5) other assorted goodies like cadbury eggs and sweet tarts shaped like easter bunnies and eggs.

My grandmother forwarded the craziest thing. I will post it here if I can figure out how. It's a bunny rabbit, rapping about easter. RAPPING. I was all, omg, dude someone needs to take the internet AWAY from here and get her new meds. It was funny, but damn. It's like the time when she got my mom this shirt with cats on the front. So innocent, and cute, you could even see their tails and stuff. YEs, and then mom turned around. I thought I'd crap myelf on the spot. CAT ASSES. That's right, I said cat asses! When I gently brought it to gramma's attention she looked at me completely straight faced and said, "Babe, that's why I bought it, it's a scream!" She calls everyone babe, btw. She gave no thought to the fact that mom could never actually WEAR the shirt out in public. I think she still has it, somewhere.

The time's changed here. Which is strange, but I think they do it here one week before England. I'm not sure how that works. I thought it was the first week of April, but apparently not. At least it's over a holiday weekend. That way we can all adjust before we get back to the work week.

The weather is gorgeous. For everyone who left, mothah fuckah's I'll cut you. It is SOOOO nice here. Sunny, highs in the 10's (50's for F). Just gorgeous. Everyone is out in the street in force. They really could not have ordered a more perfect weekend to introduce spring. Though, I speculate that we are still in for a few more weeks of cold weather before it clears off and turns truly nice. There is still snow on the ground and it's been 14 and sunny the last three days in a row ... damn unmeltable snow. All the ice is coming down river through Stockholm HArbor, so there are tons of cool pictures to take etc.

Anyways. I hope everyone has had a wonderful weekend. I'm enjoying a little down time, some good food, and tremendous weather. Sending my best wishes to you all.

~brian

Saturday, March 26, 2005

State of the Readers 4.1.01

Wow, given the holiday's around the corner, I'd have expected an influx of bored at-home-vacationers. However, I am saddened to admit that this is the least "read" week I've had since november.

With C having left for the US, and D in England I can account for some of the readers from sweden. At least Tongo keeps reading :) the stats are as follows:


  1. Network
    35%

  2. IP
    25%

  3. Commercial
    18%

  4. TONGA
    11%

  5. SWEDEN
    6%

  6. JAPAN
    3%

  7. Organization
    1%

  8. CANADIA
    1%



Hope everyone is having a wonderful holiday.

~B

Friday, March 25, 2005

French Radio

On the same vein as the french driving logic, I figured we'd stick to car themes and cover RADIO in france. But only if when you say 'Radio' you mean the pathetic attempt to provide abismal radio on the weakest stations of all time.

My dad and I discussed, at length, what we would do to fix the travel guide. Recommending good maps, actual hotels still existing in the cities you travel to, and even par restaurants were at the top of our list. The idiots who wrote the damn thing didn't even survey, they just went where they wanted to go, got bored, and stopped researching. So not thorough, and decidely unhelpful to a real traveller -- namely my father, but in part myself. Bring CDs to listen to in the car. OMG, so bring CDs, otherwise you are in for a radio-surfer's nightmare.

The Stations played C-rap. Or, in modern tongue compliation and Rap. Compilation is a lame mixture of really bad English and French pop, the stuff that was popular about 6 - 8 years ago, played repititiously throughout the day. Of course, what station is complete without a little Rap. I swear, if I wanted to listen to rap, I'd put on a rap station. The worst part was that each channel had playlists that were the same ... each ... and every ... day! We happened to be in the car at the same times each day.

Station Commercials. I do not claim even remote understanding of the french language. However, I can understand enough to get the gist of commercials. You'd hear the normal radio jingle with some stuff playing the background. O - M - G the stuff int he background was like the Police and Led Zepplin, U2 and Aerosmith etc. Then you got the decisive record-scratch. And some talking. Then crap music. We could only assume this meant, "This is the stuff we WON't play, that's why we're RFL!" I was thinking, I'll cut you, I'l fuckin' cut you! It was maddening to hear viable aternatives qaushed by the commercials.

Alternative and Rock stations. All rock stations are pure Rap stations. Skyrock, harcore Rap. Alternative is a liberal term, instead of a genre of potentially audible music, meaning an alternative to the other crap stations play. So a commercial, I speculate, probably sounded something like this, "YOu hear this music, *skritch* we don't play this! That's why we're RFL, your alternative to the other crap stations who also don't play what you want to hear. R - F - L, radio station."

Station strength left wanting. So long as you could deal with just having some background 'noise', it usually faded to snow in a few kilometers. Okay folks, Paris is on a plain, with rolling hills to the North and North West (where we were) why the HELL can't you put some juice in it and solidify a station! Usually you lose stations because of natural barriers like, oh I don't know, MOUNTAINS and DISTANCE. Neither of which should have been a problem, but there I was, channel surfing ever few Km. Usually in the middle of a song as it faded to snow. I didn't bother setting stations since doing so reaked of futility since the other stations were fading in and out so much. So disappointing. If you ever go to France, TAKE CD's!!!

~B

Thursday, March 24, 2005

French Driving Logic?

While in France we drove a considerable amount. This lead to several discussions about French driving logic. Granted, we had the shittiest tour guide of all time. I mean this thing was a total piece of crap, but we DID have the mind to get a driving map before we left stockholm. Only one of the smartest things dad and I did before we left. He did most of the planning, leaving me to implement the plans and navigate. It worked okay until we ran into french driving logic -- if we can even call it that.

When in Paris. You need a really great map, tenacity and the patience of a saint. Agression helps, but usually only gets you in trouble. good reflexes and immunity to flinches when you see people clip one another are essential. Of course you should note that not everyone yells, but shouts probably equated to "Mothah fuckah, I'll fecking cut you!" Of course, being french, it was not that simple. It probably sounded more like, "You fornicator with female child bearers, my new smart car will decimate and render useless your pathetic peugot." Very similar to another french taunting that comes to mind, "I fart in your general direction ... your mother was a hampster and your father smelt of elderberries!" Of course you add in the gutteral nuances, epiglotal stops, and nasal sounds and it just kind of blends in with traffic and horns blowing.

Around the countryside. Signs on the road mean absolutely nothing. I'm dead serious. If they say, "Paris 123 Km." It means, "We measured this from an arial view making a straight line form the point where you are, more or less, and your desination. However, we asked the highway planning department to make the road as curvy as possible, for your pleasure, of course." The numbers had no correlation to the actual distance. Bastards. The more important disconnect though was the road signs and the directions to other roads. Well, we must assume you don't want to be on ONE road the whole time. Or at least you'd like the option of derevation from the main road. Oh, but wait, the signs, they point you to this fun traffic circle. You go through the traffic circle, not seeing another indiciation of where to go. So you pass through. Still no signs. Use the next circle to double back. Go through the circle again, try a new exit. This one, also wrong. Do it again. Finally you get the right one. You know how it's right? About 1 K down the road there is another sign that says, oh by the way you are on the right fucking road. This happened at least 6 times. We were in some pretty isolated areas, but damn, it takes a while to get that all down.

What do we take away from this? Give no credence to road signs, until you see the reminder sign that says you've gone the right way. You are fucked if you ever want to know exact distances, so dont bother. Oh, and if you want to go into the more isolated areas, bring at least three maps, the rotaries make anti sense, and we did it deliberately to taunt you. "Now be off with you fake Arthur King, or I shall taunt you a second time!"

~B

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Concorde and Tour Eiffel


Concorde and Tour Eiffel
Originally uploaded by mrbrian02.
I really liked this picture. I took it yesterday when I was dying of stomach flu and the hotel kicked me out. I went to Jardin de Tuilles to get to the Louvre; which, by my luck, was closed on Tuesdays.

So, I had some soup and walked though the park, back towards the Place Concorde pictured here. I liked this shot because I caught a little symmetry with the back of the statue balancing the large memorial and the obviously-large tour eiffel.

I plan on making several posts about France over the next few days :) Hope everyone is well!

~B

La Mont St. Michel


La Mont St. Michel
Originally uploaded by mrbrian02.
A later sibling to the sun set picture, this is St. Michel well after close. The sun is close to down, as you can tell by the warm red colors on the lower buildings. We are still a good way off, so you can tell how big the structure is. We debating sleeping in the City, but opted for a view of the Mont instead. I really think it was most impressive the first time we saw it, as this picture shows the Mont's presence and size sufficiently.

Sunset St. Michel


Sunset St. Michel
Originally uploaded by mrbrian02.
I cannot begin to describe some of the things I saw in France this weekend. It really was amazing. We covered a large area, which I will post samples of as I coallate my pictures.

This is one of the few pictures I've had time to fix, though I only really changed the size. We approached La Mont Saint Michel around 5pm. By the graces of reading too much on the internet, my dad remembered a pull-off to get a good view of the waterbound structure over the flat expanse of brackish swamp.

Thursday, March 17, 2005

Gone and in the News

I leave in a few hours, so this is likely my last post for a while. Hopefully you guys won't miss me too much :) C is off in the States and D is getting ready to head to England. I can imagine that they are both preoccupied and not missing me much :)

I promise to take lots of pictures. We are going through Normandy for the most part, so there should be lots of cool pictures. I will be in Paris for a day, but I don't plan on doing a whole lot. I really did not enjoy Paris last time I was there. Granted, I was an angst-filled teen with the whole world to be mad at. I just really did not like it. The thing that sticks out most in my mind was that they had a motorcross type show infront of Sacre Coeur ... I mean common, that SHOULD have been cool ... what was I thinking? I did grow an inch while I was there though. Maybe that explains it?

In the news. I found out that some one from my sordid past is HUGELY in the news. Interesting, I met the person on odd circumstances, but it's strange. There is a HUGE to do about said person right now in the US. I hope that everything turns out for the best. I wanted to contact the old acquaintence but I'm sure I'm a memory long forgotten. Plus, my timing leaves a little to be desired. I would want to reach out to offer support, but it would look more like a "omg, I know you, can I share in your tarnished fame?!?!?" Which is totally not my thing. Oh well. I wish I could be supportive somehow; I'll think about it.

Fun new games. You must also try out flip word on Yahoo!games. Link here FLIP WORD so much fun.

State of the Readers 4.2.1

Interestingly, the major organizations have squeezed out some of the smaller. This is kind of expected, and I doubt my writing really catches the long term readers :( I did get a reader who returned after finding my blog through a porn search (search was porn, food and pets ... yeah ... )"Peter, what is this I hear you are having trouble with your TPS reports?!" "Did you get a copy of that memo?" Anyways, stats as follows:


  1. Network
    31%

  2. IP
    24%

  3. Commerical
    21%

  4. Sweden
    14%

  5. Tonga
    7%

  6. Canadia
    2%

  7. Denmark
    1%



This week's peak days were Sunday, Monday and Tuesday. I had the highest traffic ever on Monday with 46 visits. Sunday had 90 views. Monday had 130 views and Tuesday had 48 views.

If you are looking for new blogs to read, Life Under Cover is about an undercover cop who has a flare for writing in a semi-pornographic way. Quite enjoyable. For something a little less carnal try JC's place and Grace. For something dry, young and funny try The Megan, Megan, and Simon Under Cover. I know I pimp out the same places every time, but dude, GO READ, they are fun :)

Hopefully talk soon. Everyone have a great weekend

~brian

Star Wars Episode III Trailer

from official site

http://movies.channel.aol.com/feature/starwars/trailer.adp?type=med

~B

Wednesday, March 16, 2005

Mjolk: Fun Story or ?


hcandersen1
Originally uploaded by mrbrian02.
I was washing this mjolk, milk, carton so I could recycle, when I noticed the back. Actually, milk cartons are great ways to learn and test out your swedish, in part because it is written for children. This is a promotion for Hans Christian Andersen, one of Denmark's best known authors. Of course, they chose the best story, "The Emperor's New Clothes" to depict on the advert. I thought it was funny.

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

Swedes: Proportional the Sunlight?

If the denizens frequenting the streets of Stockholm are any indiciation, Swedish population is determined, exponentially, by the amount of sunlight at any given time.

today is one of the first sunny days. In a while at least, though it's cold (-5C or 25F), but swedes are out in force. I live on a gangvag (walking street) so it's a pretty heavily trafficked area anyways. Today, however, is ridiculous. There are people standing in the middle of the street, facing the sun, eyes closed. Taking it in, as they eat their lunch from the local korv stand (hotdog, kinda). It's really nice to see people out, but they are going to need to start rerouting traffic if it gets any worse!

~B

Bored ... but not perverse

After seeing JC's test results, I decidedto try the pervet test. Unfortuately, or fortunately, I did well. I'm surprised, more by the lack of diverse questions than anything else. Here's what it said aboot me:


How sexually perverted are you?

Saintly

Whats wrong with you? Okay, at least you're not a dirty perv like everyone else, but do you even have a pulse? Try hanging out with Marc Almond or somebody to pump uo your perv levels.

Click Here to Take This Quiz
Brought to you by YouThink.com quizzes and personality tests.



Great huh ... LIARS!!!

~B

80's Dance to Stretch Your ... FOREARMS?

In a recent bout of awareness at the gym, I witnessed the most interesting way to stretch your forearms. People who do not lift are thinking wtf mate, he's on crack. It really is interesting, since it caught my attention b/c I thought the dude was dancing to the Backstreet Boys blaring over the speakers. I, personally, try to block out most of the music, but this guy used it to his advantage ... I think.

The 80's dance. You guys have to remember this one. The guy was even wearing sweat bands around his wrists, how cliche?! This is the dance where you put your hands together in front of you, like a prayer-fist of interlocking fingers. Then, you move your arms in rhythm to BAD music and make them appear fluid. It looks kind of like a wave. The next is to put your hands together like you are in traditional prayer (no locking fingers). Push both hands together. Now, and this is tricky, move your hands as one so that you make a wave down your forearms. Dont' worry if you can't get it the first time, it's tricksy. I know everyone has seen it.

It really works. I didn't try it while I was at the gym, because people can always tell when you are trying to copy them. I notice it all the time. Mostly, you notice because people try to copy without being confident about it, they do it kind of half-assed. Anyways, I tried it and it does seem to work, but I'm not sure there aren't better ways to stretch. At least if I'm doing more traditional stretches no one can accuse me of listening to the god aweful eurodance crapola. What I wouldn't do for a 30 minutes alterna/punk mix. I'm very tempted to take in some rage, audio slave and bad religion and see if I can coerce them into playing it. At least you can grunt to that stuff.

Have a good one

~B

Beware the Ice of March

My sister had comments about the Ides of March the other day. I'm not worried about the Ides, so much as I'm worried about the damn shards of ice threatening my livelihood.

We've lots of snow here, in pretty regular intervals. It keeps the stuff on the ground to a couple inches, which is cool as far as I'm concerned. However, the rooftops of the buildings are a totally different story. They heat and cool, heat and cool, creating these shale-like ice sheets, begging for a warm day to come down and impale some innocent passer-by.

I'm looking out onto my balcony. It's covered with snow, a thin layer, with HUGE gouge marks where the ice slides off nearby overhangings. It's pretty spectacular to see the icicles fall and explode, but a little disconcerting when you are sitting here in relative quiet and they hit the glass door. I swear I've jumped out of my skin three times already this morning. THAT's why my knees hurt! I keep hitting them on the desk ... As K, my lovely Georgian friend, is famous for saying, "Bastardos".

On a different note, I'm going to France with my dad for a long weekend. We are going to drive around Normandy. Oh, there is nothing better for bonding than driving, battle grounds, good food and being in a country where neither of you speaks the language. It should be good times. I just looked at the forecast! it will be in the 60's while I'm there!!! omg, it's like summer!!! I probably won't get to post though :( Which is sad. Hopefully I will just make up for it when I get back.

Hope everyone has a great day

~Bsan

Monday, March 14, 2005

Problems with the *friend word

And by *friend, I mean * = boy/girl. I've noticed that several of my friends have issues with this boyfriend girlfriend thing. When to use it. Does it matter who uses it first. Is there a constructive gf/bf, even without the words. Do we need the words? Do we want the words? Do we want to need the words? Lots of fun questions. None of which I will answer here.

Boyfriend. One of my buddies has been seeing a guy for a little over a year (I think, I suck at dates). I always ask how things are going, and I didn't really realize I'd been asking the wrong questions. He took this guy home for the holidays, and then spent some of the holidays with the guy's family. Hmm, that is suspect, but still they have very par introductions,"Oh, you know A." and "This is P." For my friend, he's hesitant to be the first to say boyfriend. I suspect that is out of consciousness for the other guy. So, even if my friend knew his date would not be offended by the title, would he still avoid it? Are they really boyfriends? When do you venture from 'total integration' on the friend, social and sexual stage to full fledged boyfriendage? I half expect to get berrated for talking about this, but I think it's interesting :)

Girlfriend. On of my other friends has no trouble calling her significant other a boyfriend, but there is no reciprocation -- and I venture that there is cringing at her use of such a formal title. I've much better insights into her relationship, but her's a perfect example of constructive *friendage. They were friends before dating, so on a very basic level they were boy and girl friend. However, they have dated now for a bit, and do most of the integral stuff including reciprocal time with family. While she's comfortable using the terms, and WANTS to use the terms, he's vehemently opposed -- for his own reasons. But, it seems that they are constructively boyfriend and girlfriend.

When is it appropriate to start calling someone your bf/gf? Is there a time when it is supremely inappropriate to call someone a bf/gf? How do you know it's okay? How do you know it's REALLY okay? Now I'm thinking about this ... "damn my eyes." I'll think on it somemore and get back to ya'll.

~B

Why I'd be a good boyfriend

Just to note, JC copied me copying The Megan. Inspired by The Megan, yet again, I feel compelled to write why I'd be a good boyfriend. After giving it some thought, I am very much like JC, I do not like talking about my personal life much, and I don't take compliments well. This should be a good exercise for me, at least emotionally. It will be interesting to see what my friends think about my list of qualities :)


  1. I'm cute.
  2. I'm not stalk-me-I'm-hot-good-looking, thereby limiting jealousy and roaming eyes
  3. I trust others
  4. I am loyal
  5. I listen
  6. I am not afraid to fight
  7. I am really good with animals (pets, and only pets ... what are YOU thinking about ?!).
  8. I am great with kids (stop it, that's gross)
  9. I can rig alomst anything
  10. I'm even better when I have instructions
  11. I like meeting people
  12. I'm an amazing cook
  13. I'm even good at grilling
  14. My body tempurature runs hot when I sleep
  15. I am good with emotions
  16. Love sports
  17. Like to keep in shape
  18. Have a nice smile
  19. I'm thoughtful of others, usually more so than myself
  20. I'm a great hugger
  21. I'm an even better kisser
  22. I give killer massages
  23. Fullbody even, though I'm out of practice
  24. I have an affectionate-come-hither-touch for those lazy times in bed
  25. I like to nap a lot - goes well with 7, 8, and 14
  26. I'm a good size for snuggling/spooning
  27. I am well read and traveled
  28. I like to share experiences
  29. I am open minded, and yet, american
  30. I believe Chivalry and Romance are not lost
  31. I want to be swept off my feet
  32. I believe in attraction at first sight
  33. I've experienced it twice
  34. I always try to be my lover's best friend
  35. I have a huge random knowledge base
  36. thus I'm a killer trivial pursuit partner
  37. I've no fear of parents
  38. I've a great, but rather strange, family
  39. I've always wanted to bring someone home for the holidays
  40. Thoughtful gifts are paramount to expensive gifts
  41. I like watching scary movies with someone close
  42. It gives me more opportunities to scare the feck out of them later!
  43. I like to integrate friends, but believe in a separation of 'church and state'
  44. I understand needing to go out separately
  45. So long as we both come home trashed >:)
  46. I appreciate sacrifice
  47. I never expect it
  48. I like to try and do interesting things to 'learn lessons' (stop it, this is totally clean!)
  49. I'm currently growing out my hair to donate to Locks of Love for kids with cancer
  50. I'm always there for support



Hope that sums it up well :)

~B

pissed about haloscan

haloscan deleted all the existing commentary on my blog. I'm uber not happy about that ... I have 27 unread comments. Sorry if you said something uber clever :( You can recomment if you'd like.

~B

Haloscan commenting and trackback have been added to this blog.

Sunday, March 13, 2005

Virgo (me sign :) )

I thought this link was interesting ...

Virgo - en espanol

State of Readers - 4

Wow, I wanted to take notice that the piechart is going crazy.

Commerical
33%

IP
31%

SWEDEN
12%

Network
11%

TONGA
4%

CANADIA
3%

Educational
2%

UNITED STATES
1%

MEXICO
1%

JAPAN
1%

AUSTRALIA
1%


Grace, my apologies for the suck that is blogger. I wonder if I could complain about the comments thing ... maybe it's the gods getting back at me for commenting on my own materials >:(

C. I had my phone on vibrate all weekend. It is dinner time, I will call you after.

Simon, dude, get better.

The Megan, get better.

Megan, tell me more about Venice, I'm dying to know, then you can come to Stockholm, the Venice of the North and compare.

My best,

~B

*********

UPDATE:

random, fun changes and new countries :)

Commerical
33%

IP
32%

SWEDEN
10%

Network
10%

TONGA
4%

CANADIA
3%

Educational
2%

UNITED STATES
1%

NETHERLANDS
1%

MEXICO
1%

JAPAN
1%

AUSTRALIA
1%

AUSTRAI
1%

Stop that Old Man!

I was with my dad today, postwork out, on the way to get a Kebab. We are moving with the thin flows of people on the street, avoiding the ice, and cursing the cold. The street is, for lack of better term, quiet. Suddenly I hear the theft beeping sound -- you know the one in stores if you leave on a tag.

Some dude who was like 95 walked out onto the street. He looked around, lost, with the beeping still in the background. Then he straightened the filched sweater and turned to a lady on the street, "What do you think?" (Vad tycker du om den har ...). The security tag dangled blatantly from the wool coverlet. The beeping stopped, and she responded as we passed out of hearing range.

The poor dude slowly moved back in the store, setting the alarm off again. He didn't even flinch. No one ever came out of the store to see what was being stolen. It just struck me and I wanted to share :)

~B

Things you may not know about me ...

This post is so inspired by The Megan introduced to me by JC. Megan's recent bought of illness and obsession with basketball exacerbated her insomnia one night and she wrote: "What the hell are you bitchin' about? I gotta sleep under some Chinaman named after a duck's dork." (Clever quote from 16 candles) -- did you guys know that Joan Cusack was in that movie, give the neck-brace girl a closer look next time! I'm thus inspired. Here's some little known facts about me.


  1. I slept 2 hours, on average, my first three years of ugrad.
  2. I was suicidal for 3 years in undergrad
  3. During which time I resented my family, and mostly my dad
  4. I, thankfully, am over that now
  5. I obsess about movies, and usually take myself to a few movies a month
  6. I used to play semi professional soccer in Europe
  7. I never scored a goal in regulation time
  8. I made one of two shots on goal in an international friendly against the czech national team
  9. I miss soccer more than people realize -- though not enough to invoke secret cutting
  10. I play computer games like a logic puzzle. If it can't be reasoned out or perfected I obsess until I have a close-pattern
  11. I over analyze everything
  12. I've always wanted to teach, but my family told me it was a waste of my schooling.
  13. The are just now coming around
  14. I hate my body, but at least it's my hate
  15. I've had three long term relationships
  16. Two of which ended with my significant other cheating on me
  17. The last was an emotional abusor
  18. I've been single for three years
  19. I've never been dumped
  20. I've only been completely emotionally in tune with one person
  21. I feel alone, a lot
  22. I want to find true love
  23. I enjoy sleeping with someone as much as sex
  24. Playing around (with each other)is more important than sex, usually
  25. I give really good hugs
  26. I'm an even better kisser
  27. I want kids
  28. I would be a great dad
  29. I'd be just as good a spouse
  30. I read, a lot
  31. I love fantasy and sci fi
  32. I play video games when I'm not reading
  33. I love anime
  34. I love cartoons
  35. Angry music always makes me feel good about myself
  36. I fantasize about having psychic powers
  37. I only use my 'powers' for good, even in my dreams
  38. I think most people around me are smarter
  39. I am only funny when I don't try
  40. I have a unique eye for pictrues
  41. I went to law school to please my parents
  42. I never wanted to go to law school, it was something to do
  43. I stayed in MD for my ex
  44. I will never stay, move or mold my life around a new relationship again
  45. I have few friends
  46. I have fewer close friends
  47. I have almost no male friends
  48. I want to travel more
  49. I'm from a tiny town in North Carolina
  50. Every time I go there I feel sick
  51. I feel I have a lot to offer someone
  52. I like to think I can hold my alcohol
  53. Beer gets me drunker than hard alcohol
  54. I used to bartend
  55. and Barback
  56. I've turned down sex from a porn star
  57. I've accidentally gone out on a date with an escort
  58. 14 lesbians, so far, has asked me for a 'donation'
  59. I'm a really good cook
  60. I like to tell other people I'm a really good cook
  61. I believe I missed my calling in life
  62. I should have been a chef, or restaurant owner
  63. I have terrible mood swings, akin to a 2 year old
  64. I am loyal and protective
  65. I am a total retard right after I wake up
  66. I fantasize about kissing people, all the time, especially when I talk to them
  67. I pin this on my lack of significant other
  68. I am still searching for a place to call home
  69. I've never been to south america
  70. I discount people who are 'too good looking'
  71. I dismiss models and good looking people
  72. I've yet to be wrong about either -- whether for personality or mind
  73. I think the poem at the end of Knights in White Satin is tremendous
  74. The Last Unicorn, Labrynth, Neverending Story, and Princess Bride are my favorite movies
  75. The Belgariad and Mallorean are my favorite series so far
  76. I want to meet a famous person and treat them like I would anyone else
  77. I want to inspire people
  78. I hate brussel sprouts
  79. I also hate eggplant, unless it's japanese
  80. I wish I could do the body restoration like in Matrix, and just wake up ripped and beautiful
  81. I wish my voice was deeper, ala James Earl Jones, "People will come Ray, people will most definately come ..."
  82. I almost never fantasize about famous people
  83. I am so open minded that "I Never" usually turns into a "Waterfalls" for me
  84. I like to shower
  85. I like to be clean
  86. I like to be dirty
  87. I love sports
  88. I like sports on TV
  89. I've done 'stuff' with 3 varisty athletes and 1 professional athlete
  90. I love blue
  91. I am an amazing mediator
  92. I like people to be happy
  93. I like it even more when I get to make them happy
  94. I like to throw parties
  95. I make some of the best shots, ever
  96. I make even better cosmos
  97. I secretly hate cosmos, but they are good for other people
  98. I really dislike dancing
  99. I have to be really drunk to do it
  100. I am not bad, so long as you like it dirty and, er, close
  101. I am a HUGE flirt :)

Saturday, March 12, 2005

Blatant Flirting: A gym story

It seems I've been very sensitive at the gym recently. Between noticing the different styles of gymizens and getting things stolen, it's been quite an experience. Today may be the culminating event.

Projecting neediness. I'm clearly projecting the need to be with someone. I think it's getting to be a problem since I inadvertently flirt with anything moving, particularly when I get drunk. I think that I'm taking it so far as to show even in the gym. Go figure, the one place I'm probably most focused.

The incident. I was doing some light back exercises. To get a really good pull you have to straighten your back, puff out chest etc. You get the picture. I'm not deliberately posturing, at least. I finish one of my sets and look up as I ease the weights down. This incredibly looking asian/swede is watching me. I figured she's looking at someone behind me. I continue to lift.

I got the 'look'. Oh, you know the one. I automatically adjusted my body as I stood up, before I realized that I must look like I'm sucking in and puffing out my chest. Ha. I deliberately slouch, and she's still looking. I look down to see if I've an enormous erection or something ... no, but I blush anyways. She smiles. In any case, I finish my set, trying to ignore the attention thinking she is staring into space or something between sets, and I'm just in her line of sight. I finish my set and she touches me lightly on the shoulder as she's passing by. "Oy, forlat." She says quietly as she passes by.

Strangeness, I finished my workout without further incident. I don't think I've seen her there before, but it was just odd. The gym's here are NEVER cruisy, so it was wierd to have the random encounter. I half expected to see her again during the workout, but I wasn't really looking either. Wierd.

I figure it's because I've been thinking about being in a relationship recently. perhaps I'm carrying it over to when I meet people or when I'm just casually hanging out. That's pretty scary, to think that I'm lifting and sending out signals that I want to find someone, even at the gym. Maybe that's the way to do it ... at least you know you'd have something in common ...

hope everyone had a good weekend

~B

Friday, March 11, 2005

Next Year: Disappointments Abound

So this sucks. I've been planning to apply here and there, getting materials together, calling in favors for references etc. But, it's official. I've waited so long now that I have to put things off for an entire year. Except the Stockholm program (PhD studies).

Confusing websites. I've looked through several websites, but it is almost impossible to get the essentials from the websites: money, duration, when to apply. I'm serious, they are so vague that I spent 4 hours last night parcing out the different websites. I went to Nottingham, Queen Mary's and Hong Kong to try and put everything in perspective. Queen Mary's is the most prestigious, but told me just about nothing. To get any information you have to contact a department head. Great, just what I wanted to do, send a cold email to a university head. Hong Kong, by the time I FOUND the expenses, I was SO disgusted I had to go to bed. Nottingham, at least, I could find the expenses, but very little on the programs.

Competition for Stockholm. Stockholm, by far, has the clearest application procedure. It's free, and they stipend. The problem being that they have ONE (1) place this year ... I'm all Jesus H. Christ, how will THAT happen. They took 5 last year, and said they'd only accept 2. Hmm. Even if they accept 2 - 3 my chances are slim to none without some publications.

Jobs don't look so good. I'd really like to step into a professorship of somesort, and work towards an advanced degree. However, teaching opportunities are slim to none nowadays. I especially want to stay abroad, enriching my international experience. American experience is cool and all, but I've very dynamic backgrounds that SHOULD be opening some doors ... and yet, no :(

My mom, for other reasons, met with a lawyer this week. She mentioned what I was doing and the lawyer gave her email etc and said I should contact her. I know I should be giving law firms a second look, but it is REALLY not what I want to do. I know that, and I'm not sure I should run against that, except that I may have no choice. How much would that sucks: You know you don't like the work, but you have to take the job anyways, and it puts you years away from teaching or getting another degree.

Fun. On a lighter note, I have a great research project to propose for doctoral studies. It is completely cutting edge, and combines my background of environmental and arbitration law. It's also a nice international element. The professor who is currently advising me suggested a similar topic, and he's on the doctor review committee for Stockholm. I'm debating asking if he will support my candidacy along with an Arbitration professor. Who knows. Things will work out the way they should. Just think, I was waitlisted for my current program, and now I hope to graduate with honors!

Dad comes home today, so I should clean a bit. Hope everyone has a great weekend!

~B

Strangeness on Blogger

*NOTICE* This is for the 4 blogs I've just tried to post on that told me,'NO'. I think blogger hates me. I tried to post on my sister's blog a few times and it keeps telling me that it can't find the blog I'm looking for. I've also tried to post a new posting on my blog and it's telling me no :(

State of the Readers - 3

Wow. Several new developments in the reader statistics.

Education reappears. Education reclaimed 1% this week. I'd like to give a shout out to an Aggie who visited my site from Texas A&M. GIG'EM AGGIES!! Sorry, I had a Texas moment. Half of my high school friends went to A&M the other half went to the other State school. University of Texas. I've heard from graduates of both schools that you shouldn't mention the schools together in one sentence.

US, Org and Mx also take 1%. Mexico (.Mx) is a new comer. US I'd never seen, until I saw my sister's stats.

Canada takes hold. Canada really put it to Tonga this week, robbing them of 4% points. Canada now ties Tonga with 4% of the total reader pool. I'd like to give a shout out to GRACE for making it happen. She's had some really great community postings recognizing fallen Mounties. Please go check it out.

Sweden and Network tie. With 12% these two seem unmoveable.

Commercial and IP still vie for the top. Commercial hung on to the top position this week with 33%. IP threatens to take the first position daily, fluctuating between 32 and 31%.

Some showed, but did not stay. Notably, Japan is absent from the statistics this week, and only held position on Monday. Singapore showed for one day, as did Russia.

Hope everyone had a great week!

~B

Thursday, March 10, 2005

Fun Sleep Stories

Inspired by my sister's post, I am doing a post on fun sleeping stories. Oh, we all have them, just that some people have better stories than others. Mine aren't spectacular, but they are fun :)

1. Staying with my Sister.
I went to stay with my sister a few times while we were both in ugrad, about 6 - 8 hours from each others (depending on who was driving of course). I was there, for an a cappella competition in her collegiate city, so I stayed with her. I had a friend from the group stay with us. His gf wanted me to keep an eye on him, and what better way than taking him to an all girls school ...

Anyways, we settle down in our respective sleeping bags on the floor. Now, for those who do not know me well, the second I settle down 'to try and sleep' I'm out. I mean dead to the world. Usually. so I settled down. Sis's roomie stayed up to work on a paper. Sometime round 2 when she was heading to bed, she stepped over me and I jerked. "Ouch", "Ouch". Of course she freaked out thinking she had stepped on me, but I was totally asleep. Apparently I have a sense of humor, even in Rem (gratuitous lawyer joke for those who caught that ;) ). So you can imagine the poor girl is stressed and trying to make her way to bed and I, the sleeping corpse, makes her think she's hurting me. Is no good :)

Another time, I think on the same visit, we were nestled in our bags. Lights were out, except maybe for Sis's roomie. I'd been asleep for some time. Then, suddenly, I stand straight up (like I'd been pulled up by rope, i.e. possessed). I start brushing at my clothes and shouting," Get them off, SPIDERS, get the spiders ..." Then I fall back down in a heap and go back to sleep. My friend completely freaked out and couldn't go back to sleep. I think this is expected now whenever I go stay with my sister :)

Her first, or maybe second term, I went to visit. I drove 6 hours straight (oh, I made UBER good time) and came to see her and wanted to take a nap. I immediately curled up in her over-stuffed-down-nest that she called a bed and went to sleep. I woke up a bit later with a little stuffed dog on my shoulder and about 10 girls in the room. I was all ... um, what's going on. They'd apparently stormed the room and taken pictures and stuff ... I'm not conivnced I've seen ALL the pictures >:)

2. Crazy, Vampiric Roommate.

This was insane, my roommate from first year in undergrad. The first day we get in, we put all our stuff away then go do social stuffs. I had a pretty good time. My roommate stayed in the room, arranging his side so it was all black and goth-esque. I was all, whatever, my side was blue and white, so we were basic opposites, kinda.

That night I go out to a frat party, since I'd already met a bunch of brothers. roomie stayed put and was tucking in about the time I left. He laid on his back, pulled the covers up under his arms, then folded them across his chest like a mummy. No joke. I left, promptly. Just imagine, this wierd kid, in his black sheets and bed cover, on his back like some sort of corpse.

I came in around 1. Oh, I was pretty drunk, but I had enough sense to not lock the door before I left so I could just squeak in. I was also a master of stealth after living with a mother who used to wake up when the cat walked on the carpet. So I came in as quiet as possible. I'm almost completely undressed and I turn down my bed.

I notice some movement on the otherside of the room. I glance over, and freak boy is still in the exact same position. Freaky, I think. Then, his head turns, and his eyes snap open like a horror flick. There was just enough light in the room to see his eyes contrasted with his pastey skin. Then he said, "Were've you been ... I've been waiting." I was freaked at this point.

I got into bed. I slept with my back to the wall, curled in the fetal position. It could have been the alcohol, but I think it was the roommate wierdness. Needless to say, I was in the housing office the next day requesting a room change.

3. Waking up from Naps.

I am a total retard when I wake up from naps. I'm over trying to convince people otherwise. I used to pick up the phone and tell people I wasn't napping. I'm not the person who can pull it off though. It's like talking to me when I've been playing videogames -- I'm just not all there, at least not in the conversation. Now I'm just up front, "dude, I just woke up, can I call you back?" Oh, and the whole politeness thing, I'm over that too, "yeah you woke me up, now you have to wait for me to call back because I'm totally useless to you >:)" Luckily I don't nap that much.

There are so many, but these were fun. I've a few more I may post in the next few days.

have a good one

~B

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Gym Etiquette Revisited

Today is the first time I've run into swedish rudeness AT the gym. So far, the gym's been a very neutral ground, with several instances of people asking me about what exercises I'm doing and why etc. In any case, gyms are not a place for rudeness. In fact, some gyms ban rude members.

Today, however was different. I was doing triceps after my chest work out. Normal, on cables, doing some pushdowns and then light weight rope extensions. Some dude, dressed like the typically preppy swede comes over and starts to TAKE my bar. I had just stopped using it, and he starts to remove it!

I was like, dude! I said, "excuse me," *pause* "Ursakta,"(excuse me in swedish) *paus* "Forlat," (I'm sorry in swedish) *paus* "Pardon,"(excuse me in every other language) "Excuse ME!" (obnoxious american) *pause* By this time it's half off "I'm really not done with that," I puff out between reps. As I'm trying to finish up my set so he doesn't take my bar. He's like, "You need this one? ARe you sure?" I'm like, um, "Yeah, I need that one I'm almost done." "This one, the one that's now off the hook?" he retorts. I stop and look right at him, "Yes, that one, now put it back, I've one set and I'll be done. You can have it AFTER I'm finished."

He put is back, and then went to find another, similar bar. Can you believe it. I had to basically rebuke a 30 something yo guy for not playing nice in the sand box. I don't think he lifts there very often. I did notice one of the guys who is normally there watching. I wonder what would have happened if I'd have raised my voice ...

~b

Birds: They're Back

A sure sign of spring are the birds. And by birds I mean the loud, annoying seagulls.

Birds are day-light driven. Anyone who's had birds will know that you usually have to cover them to get them to go to sleep. The cover simulates actual night, since we keep lights on after dark, which confuses the things. So, it makes sense that when it gets dark the birds shut up, and then when it turns light they wake up. This is tremendous, except that light breaks the horizon here around 4:30 now.

Seagulls make up for it. I also think that gulls, in particular, don't want to miss anything, so when they DO wake they are extra loud, you know, to make up for the time they missed. Either that or they have waking dreams and wake up screaming every morning. It is just terrible though, because they've woken me up two mornings in a row now. I'm going to have to start going to bed at 10 or something just to get decent sleep. I guess I'll get used to it. Psychotic birds

~B

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

Ensam

Alone. Ensam in Swedish. I've been terribly alone today. For some reason I can't put my finger on, I've just felt singular and isolated. My own doing, of course, but it's tough. I'm not even sure that I would quantify what I feel as alone so much as not apart of two or a relationship. It's the absence of another. The Envanescence isn't helping, but I'm moody so it's suiting me.

Being together but alone. I have always had trouble with loneliness. Conceptually, when people read the above section you'd imagine I'm isolating myself, or not talking/seeing anyone at all. This couldn't be further from the truth. I am usually more alone when I'm with people, if that doesn't just sound bass ackwards. Like, I helped D with some computer issues today, and then we caught up over a coffee. I just wasn't there though. I mean I was there, we were together, but it just doesn't fill the 'alone space'. I don't think I said that very well. In any case, imagine being a room full of people, and I mean PACKED. They all talk to one another, and it gets dark. They move just far enough away that it is hard to make out who you are talking to, because of the lack of light, and if you move towards someone the croud shifts and you can't get closer. You know that they are there, but you are still alone, in a room full of people.

Terribly romantic. I've had these 'interesting' romantic notions all day. Oh, you know the kind, where you randomly bump into someone and they are 'the one'. I've given up on the looking, at least while I'm here. It seems that stockholm is a waste, a completly desolate and untouchable population; unavailable to me. In any case, I still imagine running into someone or seeing them across the room and just have a connection of some sort. It's got to happen sometime right? It's been a while since I had any kind of connection with a person like that ... It seems to happen to everyone else.

totally reminds me of a song. "Someone Else's Star" by Bryan White. I heard the Hullabahoos perform is at UVA when I was in undergrad and we went there to perform. I'm so going to post the lyrics. See if you relate:

"Alone again tonight
Without someone to love
The stars are shining bright
So one more wish goes up
Oh I wish I may
And I wish with all my might
To find that someone out there
Who is missing in my life

You'd think that I could find
A true love of my own
It happens all the time
To people that I know
Their wishes all come true
So I've got to believe
There's still someone out there who
Is meant for only me

Oh I guess I must be wishing on someone else's star
It seems like someone else keeps getting what I'm wishing for
Why can't I be as lucky as those other people are?
I guess I must be wishing on someone else's star

I sit here in the dark
And stare up at the sky
But I can't give my heart
One good reason why
Everywhere I look
It's lovers that I see
Seems like everyone's in love
With everyone but me....

Oh I guess I must be wishing on someone else's star
It seems like someone else keeps getting what I'm wishing for
Why can't I be as lucky as those other people are?
I guess I must be wishing on someone else's star

Why can't I be as lucky as those other people are?
I guess I must be wishing on someone else's star"

If you aren't bawling your eyes out I think I have some pepper and fresh cut onions to assist. I love the song, and it speaks to my heart, especially on days like today. It's kind of sad, but eh, it's true. I've done alot, I've seen alot, but I've almost no one to share it with.

Tomorrow will be a better day,

~B

Monday, March 07, 2005

State of the Readers Report 2

I've more activity over the last week than I had all of last term. Woo hoo! Here are some of the more interesting statistics since friday.

Raging Tonga continues to quash the smaller organizations. With an astounding 7%, Tonga continues to dominate the lower organizations while slowly encroaching on Sweden's (.se) strong hold as the largest state organization. Sweden is down to 12%.

Belgium (.be), a strong new comer. Belgium emerged in our fun pie chart over the weekend, displacing Organization and Japan. Both .Org and .Jp fell to 1% and 2% respectively. Simon was on holiday this weekend though, so I'm sure that accounts for Japan's sliding representation.

Netherlands reappears. The Netherlands (.nl) maintains 1% in the chart with Canadia.

All in all it was a tremendous weekend. I think that the most popular blog postings so far are Dating a Fat Person and Semlar Anyone (which should be Semlor btw, and is already archived :(). If anyone has not yet seen or tried The Kingdom of Loathing, give it a whirl. It's a standing RPG with some cheesy graphics, but it's fun!

Have a great week

~Brian

Sunday, March 06, 2005

Light: the Return

I feel like I've released a long held breath, anticipating the lapse of winter's grasp the ultimate peronsification of darnkess and cold. The light returneth, vanquishing the unrelenting dark. It is really amazing. The sun is coming up around 5 now, and setting around 18:25 (6:25 pm). It is really wonderful, and something that everyone notices.

I got so excited the other day. I sent a text to several friends merely stating: "It's STILL light out!" I think I sent it off some time around 6 pm when I was down town doing something. It was just so amazing to me after festing in the perpetual darkness that was winter. At least it wasn't unbearably cold this year. I hope that doesn't mean we will have a cool summer :(

Summer Cometh. Be ye impressed, and tremble before the coming of Summer. It shall be light perpetual and drive people from the confines of their offices. Fountains will spray, renewed, in celebration of the spatters of people in stages of half-dress languishing in the sun; people, even the swedish, will smile. And all shall be tanned, and be outdoors until the setting of the sun each day. They shall take into themselves excessive drink, not for the reasons feared in winter, but in exclamation and revelry in the wonder that is Summer in Stockholm.

Okay, so maybe it is a little premature. It's still snowing off and on. The temperature hovers at 0, and the grey slush I track in evidences the last heavy snow mixed with road dirt and gravel. It will come in a flurry though ... no pun intended. Seriously, it will be all snowy and crappy. Then it will rain for 2 solid weeks and everything will turn green. Then sun ... the sun stays out until 9 or 10 in the summer ... it is SO nice. I am seriously looking forward to it :) As if you couldn't tell. We get beer gardens on the water and stuff ... I mean who can fight that ... seriously?!!?!?

day dreaming of what to come

~B

Saturday, March 05, 2005

Carded

This is truly an uplifting day for me. I've been to the gym. I've eaten at least twice (if you count fun new protein shakes). I've been to the grocery to deck myself out for a party on monday. And now, best of all, I've been to the systembolaget -- state controlled liquor vendor. All alcohol in sweden over a light beer (latt ol) is controlled by the state (my apologies for the sentence, but I'm not supposed to change my writing).

Purchasing alcoholic goods. The interesting thing about the state controlled system is that some of the wines are actually cheaper here than they are in the place of origin. The state will pick one wine and promote it all year. They buy in such large quantity that the price actually drops. Go figure. This is so not true of anything else found in the store though ... which is sad. Oh well.

I picked up my goods. I purused the selection with care. I got the last bottle of 43 and DiSoronno. I topped it off with some miduri. If you couldn't tell I'm having a hard alcohol party. Everyone else will bring vodka, so I figure I'd have some stuff on hand to make tasty drinks. I've already malibu and baileys so I should be set. They had no Rose's Lime (use to make margaritas and key lime pie). Nor did they have a coctail kit or shot glasses. The Konsum (local grocery) actually stocks rose's lime though. Anyways, I get my crap and go to check out.

The carding incident. So I'm all ready to pay, the dude's tabulated my bill, which was suprisingly not bad. He asks me, in swedish, for some id. I looked at him with a completely blank face. Then I realized, omg he wants ID. I'd thought of this before I left the house, for some reason something told me to take it. I asked him if he meant my ID, in English, just to be sure. He said, 'Yes, I need to see ID, or passport or something, you look too young ..." Um, this guy is my age, I'd guess. It's still nice to get asked for ID, but I didn't think it would happen here in sweden, where they start drinking before they get into highschool. (No offense to swedish readers, but I was here then too ... and I know the drinking starts early).

All in a good day's work :) I got my booze, I got carded, and now I got to stock on glasses and stuff. Hope everyone's having a great weekend.

~Bsan

Friday, March 04, 2005

State of the Readers Report 1

I have to comment on this every now and then. It is really cool to see the different organizations and stuff that read my blog right now. The most interesting, to me, are the non general organizations. These tell me, generally, the location of the people reading. It's uber cool. And I thought you might like a small breakdown.

Of the major groupings, IP specific groups hold the largest percent. This is interesting. I figured .com would have the most, but, surprising to me, IP then .net hold the most ground. This is likely just american providers since other national provides do .co.uk or .co.au or something.

Of the national groups, Sweden(.se) has the largest share. This doesn't surprise me. I've a few friends here who read this. Japan (.jp) holds 4%, while Tonga (.to) has 3%. The tonga stats are amazing since 100K people live in the islands total approximately four times the size of washington DC. Only about 58% of the population is over the age of 14. anyways, enough random factoids. Organization (.org) took 1% today from the persistent Netherlands(.nl) who also remained at 1%. Canada(.ca) recently joined this catoclismic calculus with 1% of the total.

Education (.edu) dropped off the tables. Since I started writing more, I've lost my academic audience. I wonder why that is?

I find the numbers really cool. You guys should really take a look at the blog's I've linked. They are fun :)

Have a good night

~B

Thursday, March 03, 2005

You're never there ... never ever ever ever there

There is a complete and total deficite of Kan Jang in the city. This is the lakrits remedy I previously mentioned. I am uber pissed becase the rents left today. They left me with their cold. It's totally groady, I don't want to go into detail, but damn. At least I could still go to the gym today, we'll see if that bites me in the ass later.

So I have this cold, and no Kan Jang. I'm serious, mom took all of it. Every last stitch I had in the house. It is killing me because I went to six different stores today, only to stare at empty shelves. Dust rigns marked where the kan jang bottles sat for months undisturbed. Oh, but now that I had need, real need, they were gone. Some masse rush on the herbal remedy, leaving me riddled with a nasty cold, and no means of recooping. I will go forage again tomorrow, in the wilds of stockholm grocery stores. At least they had low fat milk today ...

~B

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

Dating a Fat Person

After a discussion with a friends on aim, I decided to post something that goads me to no end. The statement: I would not date a fat person. It is unbelievable how people thing this is a harmless statement, but don't realize that those who used to be fat, or fight with it, really find this statement offensive. This post is very frank, and not for the feint of heart.

I used to be fat. my senior year in highschool I was about 5'9 210, maybe 215 on some days. I had terrible sense of self, having played soccer for 3 years in highschool, when I stopped I ballooned. I didn't know what to do, and the worst part was that I wore weight relatively well. Not a happy thing. Then you get to college and there aren't many people who even look at you 'the right way'. I was large enough that I wore my clothes a size too big. I was comfortable in a size 36w x 32 l jeans. Though, I've got to say, my personality won through several times ... those are for other posts though.

I trimmed down for the wrong reasons. About my senior year I started running and lifting light weights, swimming and just watching what I ate. I sawed through about 20 lbs and hovered around 180 for a while. I didn't look great. I had terrible stretch marks, and my body was just, I don't know, uncomfortable. I remember sweating alot. It was not a nice time, but I started losing weight because I started seeing someone who was fit. Let's just say this person 'encouraged' me to get in shape 'or else'. They'd deny it to the end today, but it's so the reason. And I bit, and I started to obsess, for all the wrong reasons. I didn't see very good results, either. I started lifting about a year later, nothing too serious until about two years ago. I was probably in a size 33 jeans, and I'd gone down to large shirts that still swallowed me when I put them on.

I still fight with my weight. Now I'm at about a 31w and I wear medium shirts. I tend to be pretty serious about going to lift and eating, but it's more for me. I adjust to tempuratures better, I am more comfortable, and I sleep well. I don't mind the eating either :) I hover between 165 - 175 depending on holidays, and it's decent. Looking at my family I know I will never have the model 6 pack, but I have other attributes, it's just getting an amalgum of my physical and mental stats that appeal to a large enough group of suitors. It's more for me now, but there is still that under current of, would I do this if people were happy dating fat people. I'm not sure I would ... but then again it's been such a life change for me, I'm not sure I could revert.

Be thoughtful of sweeping statements. They hurt sometimes more than you think.



~B

Tuesday, March 01, 2005

Patrons from Tonga

Okay, I must be one of the most internationally illiterate persons I know. I had to look up tonga, where it is, how many people there are etc. I am amazed, but someone from Tonga visited my blog :) I'm super psyched, but it bumped the Netherlands and even Japan out of the mid-rankings with just 2.5%, Japan with 2% and Netherlands with 1 %. Simon, I know you read dude, but 2%??!!?

This is why sitemeter is truly amazing. I can click on details, and it will tell me the nation or origin. Then I am all, where the HECK is tonga. I click on the link, and I get all kinds of detail, like maps and flags. It's so fun. Everyone should have sitemeter. I'm sure Megan freaks out b/c I check her blog a few times a day, but it's still fun to see where your readers are from.

~bsan

Avid Fan

I noticed I'm posting more now than I did all of last year. It makes sense, that I'm in a writing mode with the thesis work and all, that I would write more this term. But, but I am also noticing, is that people only really the first thing they see when the enter a site. SO, I'm doing a bunch of writing that no one reads. That is so not cool.

I half expect something out of Manhunterto occur sometime. For those not familiar with the excellent work in manhunter, may be more familiar with the cheap, disreputable remake, Red Dragon. I'm sorry, but the original was amazing to me, probably when I saw it as a kid, so the remake never really 'does it' for me. Plus Manhunter was one of michael mann's earlier screenplay-directed films. You should not be able to tell where I got my title. If you can't, you are missing out. Another fun quote we used from manhunter was when enticing someone into a date it is always cool to be able to say, "Ride with me. Pet the tiger."

As I'm sitting here writing this mental vomitus, I'm reminded of a recent Family Guy rerun where Stewie shouts at Lois, "What are you trying to do woman, kill me, with another one of your vile culunary abortions?" My god babies have a way with words. My parents suggest that kids really act like that though. Well, what do we expect with all the coddling and stuff we give them it must piss them off not to be able to ask for proper food. Family Guy is 'uncancelled' btw, it returns to Fox on May 1, 2005. Woo HOO, wait, I'm stil in sweden ...

~B

Kyckling revisited

I know I promised C would never edit what I wrote, but let's be honest for 5 seconds. What the fuck was I on yesterday when I wrote that post. I used 'thought' about 2183497120347 times. 'I usually run it in the over...' wtf? I want to leave said post for the purpose of demonstrating my brain farts. I think I may have written that after a nap yesterday, which would explain so much ... namely why the hell I wrote about kyckling in the first place.

The truth about kyckling. (1) they have good spices on them, called kycklingkrydda (literally, chicken spice/seasoning) (2) the birds do not take in three tons of hormones before the slaughter, so they remain (3) small, and (4) really tasty, perfect for (5) a lazy ass who doesn't want to actually prepare a meal or dirty dishes, since you can make it on foil in the oven. Foil in oven, foil to plate, eat, roll remains in foil and discard (hopefully in garbage). If they only had these in college ...

Btw I am a master of chicken anatomical features, at least in terms of musculature. I can take a chicken to clean bone in about 3 minutes. This helps me avoid the smaller bones around the spine and joints ... believe me I'f run into them before, and it was not pretty.

I hope this post was better, because, quite frankly, I have no clue what I was on yesterday but DAMN ... I didn't even sign off.

have a good one

~B

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